Showing posts from September, 2013

Sickness, Cancer, Fear, & other thoughts

Samuel is sick. Yesterday he was nauseous for a lot of the day and then threw up. He seemed better in the evening but this morning he was throwing up bile again.

I have to confess I feel pretty sick myself. Although I don't think it has to do with whatever Samuel has. It's the pit of fear in my stomach that's building.

October 22nd Samuel is scheduled for his next CT scan and since I found out last week I've felt this dread building inside me.

I'm tempted to think somewhat irrationally and question, "Is this just a stomach bug?" or is it an indication of something much more sinister going on. I expressed my fears to Mike this morning and he gently reminded me that Samuel didn't act sick until he was on chemo. Oh yeah.

Oh that's right, things seemed perfectly normal until they weren't.  That's the sucky thing about cancer you don't know it's growing until it's grown. It hides. Things seem okay and then wham, it hits you out of l…

First Day of School Pics

September 3, 2013 First Day of School

what not to say

I was grateful when I recently stumbled across someone's post about what not to say to a person battling with a mental illness.

People have asked me in the past about what are good things to say and do and not do for people dealing with depression, grief, loss, etc. This was a good start...

Happy Birthday Mom!

Dear Mom,

I know the last ten years have been a challenge. I guess that's putting it mildly. We've been through hell and back with losing Libby and Sam... and then with the crazy medical issues of my kids. And yet Our Faithful God has sustained us!

I'm so grateful that you're my Mom. I'm so thankful for the woman I've watched you become. You fighting bitterness and giving in to JOY. You're a miracle Mom. Your attitude has provoked me to look for good in the midst of difficulty and to find things to be grateful for.

What a sweet time it's been recently building our friendship. I'm so grateful God gave me you for my Mom... and my friend. Happy Birthday!

Hair Donation.

Libby recently cut her hair and donated her pony tail to Locks of Love. My heart swelled with pride when she told the hairdresser that she wanted to give her hair to a child that has cancer.

End of Summer...


august 20th

August 20, 2010 Samuel was diagnosed with cancer.

August 20, 2013 My niece, River Anne was born.

What a difference 3 years makes.

Fire Ants, Broken Flip-Flops & God in the Midst of Trial

August Recap:

I've tried to post a few times now and just hadn't been able to. The last several weeks were too intense. In fact I got physically sick when I tried to blog about it. Literally. Threw up. Yeah, that's bad.

August 20th was eventful.
3 years prior was the day Samuel was diagnosed with cancer (rhabdomyosarcoma).

But on this particular day, August 20, 2013, I was keeping my 2 year old niece Madison  because my sister-in-law was giving birth to my new niece River Anne :)

I needed to get groceries and thought the kids would enjoy an outing. A trip to Target and then icedream at Chick-fil-A was the plan. Instead we had an adventure: getting attacked by fire ants outside in the parking lot of Target. Peter looked like he had a bucket of fire ants dumped on him. I rushed the kids inside and asked a manager who quickly called the paramedics.

It was eventful. We had about 7 Emergency vehicles blocking the whole entrance of Target. The bites were the worst on Peter. He …