Showing posts from August, 2013

Schooling & other new endeavors.

so the plan has been to homeschool Libby this year...

We had been talking and planning on it all spring and summer. Change of plans. She asked me a couple of daygs ago if she could go back to school. I'm fine with that. I hadn't purchased my curriculum yet. I have it all picked.

The deal is she will go to school with her brothers and then when we move to Norfolk we'll start homeschooling her. This actually provides the opportunity for me to focus on packing/moving stuff and not starting a huge endeavor but I'm looking forward to teaching her.

I'm excited and I'm also a nervous wreck.

I had told myself that "I will not homeschool my kids". Don't know where I got that. I guess I just didn't want the pressure. I didn't want to conform to a mold. Funny because, I loved my homeschooling experiences. I was homeschooled 5th and 6th grade and 11th and 12th. It was a fantastic time. I guess I felt inadequate for ME to be the teacher. That I didn…

& That's a Wrap.

Mike preached at a friend's church on Sunday. Afterwards they have a time of fellowship which of course involves food. The kids were handed out cupcakes after the end of Sunday school. Peter quickly started devouring his cupcake.

So intensely was he absorbed in eating the cupcake he didn't notice he was eating the paper wrapper. I pulled a long piece of paper wrapper out of his mouth. It was covered in frosting and cake bits but 95% paper.

Peter burst out,
"Hey! That was MINE!"

Summer Fun.

Been having a lot of fun this summer. I joined up with a friend and we had a fabulously crazy  time.  I had to go make some returns that required a trip to the mall. The kids did great.  These were some pics she snapped of the boys. I love Ian's "Gangsta" look. The gold ring came from a quarter prize machine. After the mall we went back to my friends for pizza and trampoline time. Fun last days of summer.

Rambling & Prayers

I’m a mess. And I realized I hate being a mess. I hate being imperfect. I hate being broken and sloppy and inadequate and unable.

What’s my problem. Why can’t I press through? 
Here’s the thing. I don’t have it together. I can’t even brush and floss consistently. I’m unable to keep up with kids chore/responsibilities. I create schedules I can’t follow and to-do lists I can’t finish. I set my hopes for the moon and always fall flat on my face. So how does one let go and surrender my expectations and desires and yet press forward and keep trying. How do I continue to keep making goals? Trying to accomplish things? How do I attempt a schedule for them? How do I model good behavior? Eating habits? Sleeping habits? Exercise habits? 
How do I move forward from this place of apathy. But the problem is I don’t have apathy. I care too much. I care what others think. I care that I’m not meeting my own expectations.
I feel like I’m banging my head against a brick wall and willing myself …

Ear follow-up

Thanks to Mike's diligence in using Debrox and cleaning Samuel's ears there was barely any wax that needed removing yesterday! Samuel tested much better in his left ear than he had several weeks ago. His right ear is still bad but has not gotten worse. He will be getting a hearing aid fitting September 5th. The audiologist did tell us that Samuel did show loss of high pitch in his left ear and that this is often the beginning of losing his hearing from chemotherapy. We will be regularly monitoring him.

I feel more peace than I did. Such complicated mix emotions of gratefulness and concern. I know the Lord has Samuel and I need to trust Him that He is able and loves Samuel even more than I do.