Showing posts from March, 2013

He's BACK!

My husband is back. Can I say how happy I am?! What a difference to know that my partner is here! I get really lost without him sometimes. Mike has such a great way of balancing my emotion and giving positive feedback and direction. It really helps. When he's gone I get disoriented. What a blessing to have him home safe and sound.

And to all you wives and moms out there who have husbands that are gone regularly (whether navy or business trips, etc.) or you are single and doing this by yourself- I APPLAUD you! I don't know how you do it!

Migraines & Desperation.

What a week-end it's been. From going the doctor's on Friday morning (Samuel has an ear infection) to getting all four boy haircuts yesterday to coping with a migraine. It has been an intense few days. Peter got a sudden fever at church today. His eyes went glassy and his breath had that infectious smell to it. So I decided to not put him in class.

A friend took me during church to get medicine and some caffeine and Peter fell asleep in her car while the Tylenol kicked in.

I haven't showered in over four days and my left side of my face is numb. Frankly, I'm a mess, and that's putting it mildly. I am overly eager to see my husband tonight. His flight gets him in at 11:30 tonight. Which will put us home well after midnight.

I'm trying to figure out if my migraines are triggered by stress or by hormones (it's that lovely time of the month). It starts with pain that goes through the back of my eye. My face goes numb on one side and my eye muscle starts to twitc…

Life & Death.

I sent my husband away on a trip yesterday. We are rarely parted and for that I'm extremely thankful.  It snowed as we drove through Norfolk.  We had a couple hours before I sent him off and we grabbed coffee and took a few minutes in one of our beloved places.... a bookstore. We were at one of our favorite places...the Book Exchange, where we have credit from exchanging books.

I found a short stack of new mysteries to consume. Mike restrained himself with acquiring only a couple new books. But time was pressing and all too quickly I had to take him to the airport. The snow clung to my hair as I kissed my husband good-bye at the airport. There's always this part of me in those moments that worries and wonders, 'will this be the last time'? I wished him a safe trip and told him to have fun and that I loved him.

After sending him on his way I went to visit a friend. Which is always a comforting thing to do. She reminds me that I'm not alone in my "motherhood&quo…

zoo 2010

I recently found these pictures of the kids on my friend's FB page. Thanks Aleya....

from 2010...


Samuel's hero artwork. Reminiscent of The Incredibles... My favorite is that Samuel said that it's him. And that he drew a bellybutton. This was from 5 or so months ago...


This is taken from before Christmas. Lib's homework. I love seeing Libby's handwriting. I am kind of sad to see how much her spelling has improved. She's getting so good. In case you can't read it or understand it the interpretation is below....

(Dear Snowgirl please make it snow. If you do I'll make a snowboy for you and we can have a snowball fight. We can have cookies and drink ice cocoa. And maybe even go sledding and make snow angels and ice skating. We would have a walk to the park. We can catch snow flakes. From Libby Napier)

To the Moon.

More of Samuel's Art

Samuel's Art: Charlotte's web

Here is Samuel's Charlotte's Web art from this winter. 


I woke up my two year old and I could see he wasn't himself. His cheeks were burning and as I picked him up out of his crib I could feel the heat radiating from his body. Fever.

Peter has had a fever all day. Not interested in eating but we've been able to keep fluids in him. Tonight he lay on me on the couch and was a snuggle bunny. He would lift up his head and say "Pi-sa" and I would give him a bite of pizza and he'd lay his head back down.

I hate it when my kids are sick but I must say I love the affection that oozes from their pores when they're unwell. They just want to be held and comforted. And I love it when I'm able to do that. Just hold them on the couch and watch movies.

The kids and I watched Megamind and enjoyed dinner- picnic style, which is a huge deal in my house because you absolutely may not eat on the carpet. They were super careful and did a great job eating on the blanket. Not one crumb on the carpet.

This morning I had lunches all pr…

Papa's Party

Papa's Birthday was a fun reason for Celebrating on Sunday. I made his favorite cake: pineapple upside down cake. The kids are actually getting to a place where they're "okay" about getting pictures taken... everyone but Peter that is!

The blessing of Pink Eye

This afternoon I had to run some errands. I decide to wait until Libby and Samuel came home and take them with me and Ian. Peter was home napping (supervised) and Michael was off at therapy.

While in line at the post office I look Samuel full in the face... and I notice a bright pink eye. Oh no. Conjunctivitis strikes again! I just had it two weeks ago. I asked Samuel if it was itchy and he told me it was terribly itchy. I tell him to touch no one and pull out sanitizer for his hands.

When we get to the car I tell Libby and Ian that they too will need to sanitize as soon as we get to the parking lot of our next destination (Wal-Mart). I place a call and leave a message for the triage nurse explaining Samuel's eye.

So, finally, we reach our destination. Car is parked and I am passing out pumps of sanitizer. Well, Ian is leaning over Libby and accidentally moves his hand and the sanitizer slides off... right into Libby's eye. So Libby is screaming and hysterical.

I get out of t…

Whose in charge?

I try to exercise at least 3 days a week. Some weeks it ends up being more. Some weeks less. One of the issues I've had with exercising at home is being interrupted by my kids. This could mean that my two year old wants to drape himself on me while I'm doing downward facing dog or that my kids need intervention while I'm on the treadmill.

Recently, I explained to the boys that I would be exercising in the garage and to please not disturb me. Mike and Libby were out of the house and Peter was napping so it was Samuel and the twins I'm talking to. Here is the following conversation...

Samuel: "But Mommy who is going to take care of us?"
Me: "I am, buddy. I just need to exercise for 30 minutes. You can watch a movie or play a game. I will be done before you know it."
Samuel: "But whose in charge? Am I in charge?"
Me: (clearly not thinking through the implications) "Sure, you can be charge while I'm exercising"
Samuel: (turns to I…

Peace Like A River...

For those wondering how my March 7th* & March 8th* went I have to say this... I am amazed at how peaceful I felt. I'm not saying I wasn't emotional building up to those days and that I didn't feel emotional on those anniversaries but I was amazed at how much grace God had for me.

I miss my sister... every day. I miss talking to her. Having her talk to me. hearing her laugh and sing. Having her to correct me on what I am doing wrong... don't let anyone fool you that just because she was younger didn't make her bossy (she was definitely bossy) :)

My hope for Heaven has grown. I look forward to the day when all the earthly things will fade away and I will be with Jesus, my Creator and my Redeemer. The One who rescued and continues to rescue me from myself, from my sin. I long to leave this broken world behind and be in the presence of the One who loved me and chose me before there was time.

And I long to be with friends and family who have gone before me. To talk…

Happy Birthday Mike!

Today Mike turns 35. I don't want to be obnoxious and brag about my spouses or entice others to be envious with "my spouse is better than everyone else's" But, I would like to give honor where it's due.

Michael Napier is one of God's greatest gifts to me. He is a means of grace in the midst of some very dark times and places that I have been. I don't know what I would do without his help, support, encouragement, love, prayers, and faithfulness.

As we have walked down this road that God has us on I have found very great strength and comfort that Mike walks with me.

What a blessing to have a husband who loves God more than He loves me. Who is willing to tell me the truth rather than feed into my delusions and lies I grapple with. Who knows that sometimes it's better to just pass me a piece of chocolate than tell me I'm just being emotional.

Mike isn't perfect. He's human. He blunders. He sins. He makes mistakes. But he is also dearly loved by…

Slimy Pits & Other Issues

Yesterday, I stumbled out of bed to help Mike with the kids. I made lunches and crawled into bed muttering apologies that I could not do more. I spent all day in bed with a migraine. Movement. Light. Anything really and I thought I was going to throw up. My head felt pierced through like a bolt was going through my head.

I have been very blessed to have few migraines. And I have such compassion for those who struggle with them regularly. They are debilitating. And when they strike I feel like I just want to die.
I couldn't eat all day until evening. And then I was ravenous and overate and felt sick to my stomach.
I wept on and off through the evening. Watching movies with Mike and pausing them, off and on, to talk about grief.
After he fell asleep I punished myself with eating again. It made me sick and I realized I wanted my body to feel how I felt inside. disgusting. Tortured. In pain. Broken. Sigh.
I've got issues.
The rational side of myself can look at this and say, "…

A Teaspoon of Earth and Sea

I recently read a fabulous novel, a book called A Teaspoon of Earth & Sea by Dina Nayeri.

One of the interesting and dominant threads of the book is the main character, Saba's relationship with her identical twin sister, Mahtab. The story is well written, a coming of age story of Saba, a young Iranian girl.

The tale starts with an accident of some sort in which you are left uncertain of whether or not her sister, Mahtab has been killed. Saba was supposed to go to America with her mother. The mystery becomes two fold. Two stories follow. One in which her sister has not died and has fled to America with her mother and Saba is left behind. The other story you think Saba and her Mamman are dead and are wondering if the other story is a coping mechanism, an imagination that is fueled by grief. You wonder if she's attempting to process her sister's death and the mysterious disappearance of their mother through made-up stories.

I found myself pierced to the core by some of the…

Elf Application

Samuel's work application for this past winter.

Samuel's Angry Birds


Out of this world.

Michael's art work this past fall as they were doing solar system studies.


Samuel wanted to have a dinosaur themed birthday party this year. I had a lot of fun finding different things that would go along with this theme. I found cool dinosaur "hats" for the kids to wear. We had PB&J brontosaurus sandwiches for the herbivores and dino nuggets for the carnivores.

They each crafted their own bags to take home with dinosaur stickers. We had a archaeological dig and looked for dinosaur bones and Mike read our favorite Dino book (Tyrannosaurus Drip.)

Unfortunately I didn't take pictures of the kids (except for Michael)... I was too focused on the party and helping the kids have fun... Which was a good thing. These are just the bare bones pics I snapped.

Grateful for a fun time had by all and the chance to celebrate Samuel's life!