It's funny how quickly life goes by. My last post was on New Year's. and here it is almost the 10th as I write. Samuel goes into clinic tomorrow. Afterward he will be sedated and have a CT scan that's an evaluation on how the chemo is affecting the tumor. Hoping for good news.
Mike and I got go away for an overnight. It was wonderful to spend some time together. We left Peter at home with bottles of pumped milk. We could never have done this without Kelsey and Aleya. Thank you ladies! What a gift. Just being able to talk without distractions and interruptions is amazing. Thank you Julie for letting us use your efficiency!
Samuel's new CVL seems to be working fine. He has been really up and full of energy... the chemo seems to be just about kicking in. Having a few weeks break from chemo really let his personality come back through. I think this last treatment is about to catch up with him. Well, it was nice while it lasted. Wonderful to get to see him be himself.
Days have been challenging. There is more to do than can be done. I'm daily submitting myself to God and asking Him, "What do I with today?"
Overwhelming is an understatement. Sometimes I feel like depression is going to smother me. I know God is faithful and He will be again. I just have to hang onto hope in the moment. Remind myself that He is with me. It's easy to become exhausted and frustrated with life. Discouraged by my inabilities. And then discouraged by my perfectionism and striving. I want to "get it all right." I want the "normal" life, whatever the heck that means.
Just found out that Libby is "citizen of the month" at school. That's fun! She is really doing a tremendous job. I'm very proud of her. She is an excellent big sister. She is so loving and caring to Samuel. She's quick to rescue Peter if he's crying and lost his pacifier. She's patient with Michael. And with Ian... well she's a Mama Hen and puts him in his place... Really though she's dear to all her brothers.
Peter's 2 month well check-up is Tuesday. I can't wait to see how much he weighs now. He's gotten so big.
Well, to bed, tomorrow is another day. I think Peter is finally falling asleep...
Mike and I got go away for an overnight. It was wonderful to spend some time together. We left Peter at home with bottles of pumped milk. We could never have done this without Kelsey and Aleya. Thank you ladies! What a gift. Just being able to talk without distractions and interruptions is amazing. Thank you Julie for letting us use your efficiency!
Samuel's new CVL seems to be working fine. He has been really up and full of energy... the chemo seems to be just about kicking in. Having a few weeks break from chemo really let his personality come back through. I think this last treatment is about to catch up with him. Well, it was nice while it lasted. Wonderful to get to see him be himself.
Days have been challenging. There is more to do than can be done. I'm daily submitting myself to God and asking Him, "What do I with today?"
Overwhelming is an understatement. Sometimes I feel like depression is going to smother me. I know God is faithful and He will be again. I just have to hang onto hope in the moment. Remind myself that He is with me. It's easy to become exhausted and frustrated with life. Discouraged by my inabilities. And then discouraged by my perfectionism and striving. I want to "get it all right." I want the "normal" life, whatever the heck that means.
Just found out that Libby is "citizen of the month" at school. That's fun! She is really doing a tremendous job. I'm very proud of her. She is an excellent big sister. She is so loving and caring to Samuel. She's quick to rescue Peter if he's crying and lost his pacifier. She's patient with Michael. And with Ian... well she's a Mama Hen and puts him in his place... Really though she's dear to all her brothers.
Peter's 2 month well check-up is Tuesday. I can't wait to see how much he weighs now. He's gotten so big.
Well, to bed, tomorrow is another day. I think Peter is finally falling asleep...
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