Midnight ramblings.
How is it that I could barely keep my eyes open a few hours ago but now I'm at home, in bed, and can't sleep. I'm exhausted. The last week or so has been particularly intense with very little sleep.
Remember how I mentioned in my last post the cheesecake on the bed incident. Well, I rewashed the comforter AGAIN... and a few hours later Peter had a blow out on it... poop everywhere. Sigh.
I'm tired and weary but I feel good. Mike and I had a good time today with several of the oncology parents from the clinic. It was a great opportunity to talk to others who are going through very similar things. Seeing some of these other parents having struggles like ours made me feel normal. People were talking about their kids "counts", blood transfusions, frustrations of side effects of chemo, common misunderstandings from others, and I felt so comfortable. Yep. I know what they mean. I know what they're talking about. I understand or at least I can relate.
It's funny. Mike and I were together but we didn't really get to talk. We were busy talking with others around us. I wonder if we'll ever get a moment to connect. It feels impossible. We barely even get to discuss what new meds are needed or have been given or when we're going to the clinic again... We're either apart or when we're together we're surrounded by others... usually our children.
Samuel's been pretty sick lately and in excruciating pain. The radiation has been burning his skin. It literally looks raw to the point of bleeding.... It's horrible. His whole diaper area is awful.... Thankfully we just got some special pain medicine and a special cream that is used for terrible burns. It seems to be helping. He's not screaming out the way he was.
Well, I'm ready to finally sleep. Maybe the kids will let us sleep a little longer?.... Here's hoping.
Remember how I mentioned in my last post the cheesecake on the bed incident. Well, I rewashed the comforter AGAIN... and a few hours later Peter had a blow out on it... poop everywhere. Sigh.
I'm tired and weary but I feel good. Mike and I had a good time today with several of the oncology parents from the clinic. It was a great opportunity to talk to others who are going through very similar things. Seeing some of these other parents having struggles like ours made me feel normal. People were talking about their kids "counts", blood transfusions, frustrations of side effects of chemo, common misunderstandings from others, and I felt so comfortable. Yep. I know what they mean. I know what they're talking about. I understand or at least I can relate.
It's funny. Mike and I were together but we didn't really get to talk. We were busy talking with others around us. I wonder if we'll ever get a moment to connect. It feels impossible. We barely even get to discuss what new meds are needed or have been given or when we're going to the clinic again... We're either apart or when we're together we're surrounded by others... usually our children.
Samuel's been pretty sick lately and in excruciating pain. The radiation has been burning his skin. It literally looks raw to the point of bleeding.... It's horrible. His whole diaper area is awful.... Thankfully we just got some special pain medicine and a special cream that is used for terrible burns. It seems to be helping. He's not screaming out the way he was.
Well, I'm ready to finally sleep. Maybe the kids will let us sleep a little longer?.... Here's hoping.
Comments
You are always on my mind. May God give both you and Mike courage to face each day. He is with you always. I love you dear friend, I look forward to the day we can get together. Miss u tons. Take care. Love to you and Mike, Libby, Samuel,Ian, Michael and Lil Peter.