Excuse me!

Who here deals with rude people? I do. I meet them all the time. They ram into me at the grocery store or shove past me on the way into the hospital. Driving just adds a whole new level of people being rude. Whether it's tail gating, cutting you off, or nearly running you down in a parking lot there are a lot of explanations for road rage.

One disturbing trend though has been on the rise. I find that men have been extremely unhelpful when I have small children afoot and a lot in my hands. I'm usually pushing a stroller with multiple children in tow.

In particular this happens when I'm going in and out of the hospital parking area or in and out of a store like Starbucks.

The other day this guy did not open the door for me but even allowed the door to slam after him and hit my stroller with Samuel in it. That was irksome.

Why is this happening?

Unfortunately, I'm sure it has to do in part with the women who might have bitten these men's heads off for trying to be polite. Maybe we're listening too much to Destiny's Child, all us women, getting independent... throw your hands up at me.

The attitude: "I can open my own dang door thank you very much."

I confess I'm also guilty of not allowing people to help me. I'm used to doing stuff on my own and having to do it by myself that it's just natural to refuse others offers. Sometimes I'm so busy with the kids I don't even realize someone's offering me help.

I am beginning to understand that when I refuse offers of help I'm not the only one affected...I'm not caring for the person who wants to help. I am stealing their blessing.

It blesses people to help others. It's a way of allowing them to give of themselves. Sometimes it's the only thing they know how to do to be kind. It breaks self-centered focus. It reminds them that there are other people out there besides themselves. It pulls them out of their daydream and back to reality, to whose right there in front of them.

I confess I struggle when I am unable to help due to time or monetary constraints or when someone simply refuses my offer of help. whether assisting with their groceries or opening a door or making them a meal. I am blessed when I give. Give of my time, money, gifts, talents, cooking, etc.

I'm starting to get it now. I want to learn to accept help. Maybe it will take a little more time with their "assistance". Maybe I could "handle it fine myself" but instead I will say, "Yes, thank you very much." And maybe it will bless them to be able to do something for someone else. I don't want to steal their "blessing".

But an added note: If your truly offering to help someone...do what's helpful. Not merely what's convenient.