It's been a long day. Full of the mundane things: preparing meals, doing dishes, changing diapers, fixing lunch, changing diapers, doing dishes... and making dinner.
I enjoyed dinner tonight... sweet, fresh corn on the cob, sweet potato casserole, salad with feta, avocado, pecans, craisins, and six pepper chicken, baked potatoes, and home-made sweet beer bread. Lots of sweet. Lots of Tasty. I managed to clean up the kitchen and it's actually spotless. I vacuumed downstairs.
I actually was able to read the Bible this morning. It was encouraging. I was reading the Psalms which I always find comforting... I keenly felt comforted this morning as I spent a lot of last night crying. I had watched a movie with Mike that made me think of my sister. I listened to some meaningful songs and I cried and I cried. Sometimes I just need to let it out. so this morning God's Word was particularly welcoming. Like a soothing balm on a a bad burn.
As I read through the Psalms I was particular struck by a passage in chapter 62.
Psalm 62:5-8 says,
5"For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,
for my hope is from him.
6 He only is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress; I shall not be shaken.
7 On God rests my salvation and my glory;
my mighty rock, my refuge is God.
8 Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart before him;
God is a refuge for us."
So in the mundane. In the heavy emotions. In the rolling waves, the ups and downs, the forwards and backwards of grief I can cling to Him and His promises.
I was once again reminded that I can trust in HIm. I will not be shaken. My hope is from Him. On God rests my salvation and my glory- not my works, not my attitudes, not my faith... but on God!!!! And because He is never changing and His character is the same... I have reason to hope. He will be faithful. My salvation is sure because of Him. Not because of me. Oh how sweet to know that He is my refuge. I seek that refuge in Him. Even in sorrow and suffering. Even in trials and heavy burdens... He is my rock! He is my help. He is my hope.